The "LOST PUPPY" Cartoon Allegory

Why didn't anyone tell the lady in the cartoon that the dog was in her butt?

Hypothetically speaking, have you ever walked by a mirror and noticed you had something green stuck in your teeth and then realized that it’s 4 o’clock in the afternoon and you’ve picked up the kids from preschool, been to the grocery store, the library, the dry cleaner AND interviewed a new cleaning lady since you ate lunch and NOBODY mentioned the small GARDEN sprouting from your lateral incisors?!!

And have you ever had one of those “You know you’re a (fill in the blank) when…” moments, but instead of making a joke about a stereotype, you are actually being serious and talking about yourself?

Well, combine those two, and you have…

I wonder how long I walked around like that?!?

Instead of a piece of food in my teeth, it was a lollipop stick stuck to my shirt. And to be honest, my life is always such a blur of activity, I can’t actually remember what I did the day I walked around with some of my children’s TRASH stuck to my sweater, but you get the idea. Knowing my two, they probably thought I was wearing the best jewelry ever! I’m damn lucky that both of my little ones are potty trained…I wonder if I’d notice a diaper taped to my sweater? So much for trying to be a "Posh Spice/Victoria Beckham” mom...ok, ok, at the very least, simply "put together" on a regular basis. It doesn’t matter how many pairs of Lucky Jeans or 7 for All Mankind jeans you have (and FYI…for me, that is 1 and 0 respectively!), or how small of a size they are. It doesn’t matter if you have perfect highlights, “enhanced” boobies and drive a Suburban instead of a minivan, lest people discover that you have, in fact, given birth. When you walk around all day with candy stuck to your tummy, you’re busted.

“You know you’re a mom when your kids were given lollipops at the bank at 10 am, but you didn’t discover the lollipop stick stuck to your tummy until dinnertime.”