Self Congratulatory Birthday Blog

How To Apply the KISS Principle: Keep It Simple, Stupid!

“It seems that perfection is reached not when there is nothing left to add, but when there is nothing left to take away". Antoine de Saint Exupéry

“It was the best birthday of my life.”

And thus M summed up the celebration we had for his 5^th birthday.

M’s birthday party kind of snuck up on all of us. Of course we were acknowledging the day, knew it was rapidly approaching…But when, a few days before Big Daddy and I were laying in bed talking over wine and beer (and the sweet absence of kids who were up in bed asleep…) I had an “OH SHIT!” moment when I realized I had about 2 days to throw something together.

Now, in my defense, it was never my plan to have any kind of a formal birthday party this year. In the years past, both M and V have had amazing birthday parties at a local horse ranch and the Art Center. I always go into a friggin’ tizzy with invitations, who to invite, the venue etc…when all M (a.k.a a rising 5 year old) really wants is to hang out, open presents and eat birthday cake. But, as Murphy’s Law dictates, shortly before my “Oh Shit” moment, M suddenly had a 30 person guest list whipped up including everyone from my hairdresser to his former preschool teacher (who is also my friend who I love!) So I was trying to find a way to gently explain that his entire preschool class, MOMS Club and YMCA childcare buddies were not going to spontaneously show up to celebrate.

Since we are living credit-card free (yes, it scares me still, to type those words…I just got my new Southern Living at Home catalog and I just about went into withdrawl convulsions…)

we thought this would be a good year to “keep it simple.” Quite frankly, in this economy, it felt foolish to do something garish and over-the-top when all it becomes (as my father would say) is a 3-Ring Circle Jerk that only serves to raise the bar for the next year. At the rate some folks go, they’ll be on MTV’s Sweet Sixteen for their SIXTH birthday and that’s just not our simple, laid-back, surfer style. Been there, done that, taking a year off. In fact, I may NEVER go back…there is something so satisfying about a good old-fashioned do-it-yourself birthday party. It feels like a really kick-ass homemade Halloween costume.

"You Tube Video"

"Tron Guy"

…And although I held my breath the ENTIRE DAY, ready to throw myself in the lake for breaking my son’s heart and filling him with irrevocable damage and disappointment, at the end of the day, as he lay his perfect 5 year old head down to bed, he told us he had the “best birthday of [his] life,” and you know what? So did we! And it went down like this…

July 10 2008…8 am: Phone call from Tina: “Hey, Brownie, Whatcha doin’?”

“Trying to figure out something for M’s birthday…he wants a party, I don’t know what to do?!”

Tina: Ok, well, we’ll have dinner, give him our presents…you make a cake…we’ll bring bread…you make a salad…

“Ok, ok, and I’ll make hamburger helper...all the kids like that…”

“Ok, I have some, I’ll bring it over…with the meat…right now…”

“Ok, we can hang up now, you’re in my foyer…”

So it was decided that we would get another package of Hamburger Helper and more meat and of course LOTS of wine…and it was a done deal…all planned in 2 minutes the DAY OF. Break! Start the clock…

Our first stop was Toys R US. M was allowed to pick out one (or three!) presents (all LEGOS, go figure…two Lego Batman and one Mega Blocks Pirates of the Caribbean) and V was allowed to choose something, as well. She got a new lunch box for “Lunch Bunch” at preschool (I. Can’t. Wait…I am going to have ACTUAL “spare time” this fall! I’ve waited THREE YEARS for this…I’m 32 years old, I have *marginal* energy, and I’ll have both of my kids in school…Woo Hoo!) and a new cheerleading mat and light-up pom-poms…(again, go figure!) Total bill? Around $50 (some of M’s birthday money from Andrew’s mom.)

The next stop was Party City…we got some Darth Vader party plates and napkins, 5 balloons with an extra special Darth Vader mylar balloon (one to grow on!) and a party game (pin the control panel on Darth Vader. No, seriously. That was the game!) and some candy prizes for the participants. Total bill? Less than $20.

Finally, we stopped at the grocery store for salad, Hamburger Helper and meat. I had the cake ingredients at home, but found some super-cool candles, so we threw those in the buggy, too. Total bill? About $10.

Yes, we did his entire party for less than $100 CASH. Here in the South, we compete with SAVING money they way folks compete, where I used to live, with SPENDING money. My wallet thanks me.

Fast forward a few hours…I fastly and furiously baked, froze and iced this:

"Lego Cake"

Note: the Legos in the Background

Here’s the thing…I HATE to decorate cakes…and yet, I find myself strangely drawn to them. Probably my LEAST desired job would be “Iron Chef Cake,” but still, I won’t let a birthday pass that I don’t make a creative cake. It near kills me, but I do it. I love having my kids in the kitchen, watching me create, and as the project comes together and they squeal with delight upon recognizing what I have made, it makes all of my “cake-stress” worth it. It is not enough for me to make a plain ‘ol rectangle cake…I’m like Emeril. I gotta kick it up a notch. BAM.

"The Keeper of Tony's Beer Cooler"

Ding Dong

Cue Tina and Family…

The Boys Building the "Black Pearl" in the dining room...ARRG, Matey!

The kids played, we had cheese and crackers and Tina made the Hamburger Helper while I finished up the cake. We had salad, dinner and then…M got to blow out his candles!!! The cake was a hit (cause of the whole Lego thing…DUH!) and the night was complete when V snuck all FIVE candles onto her one, itty, bitty slice of cake. She really IS my “Mini Me,” making it all about HER.

When it was time to open presents, M had ours, Tina’s families’ and then some family presents mailed to us by Big Daddy’s sister and parents. To end the night, the kids moved into the office to build M’s brand new Lego “Agents” set and the adults got to enjoy some…well… “adult time.” With beer and wine.

I could NEVER have imagined the day would have turned out the way it did, with two minutes of planning, and LESS than $100 bucks…We pulled the whole birthday out of a hat, the very day the shindig was supposed to go down, oh man, it felt like sliding into home base and dodging the catcher for the perfect home run. Or this chick.

It was a fabulous lesson in budget, priorities, friendship and parenting. I suppose, at some point, I realized that just like everything else with kids (my kids? Or ALL kids? I don’t know…but this is our experience…), they are so easily satisfied…their wants and needs are far less comlex than those of their adult counterparts. That for them, the “best of the best,” doesn’t necessarily come with a heavy price tag. On the contrary, simplex sigillum veri which is Latin for: “Simplicity is the sign of truth.” And for as complicated and convoluted as things usually turn out for me…I like that.

Yeah, Bo-yeeeee!