The adage goes: One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. A truth, if ever there was one, exemplified most often in a place called “Goodwill.”
I went into Goodwill looking for pet supplies. And I came out a changed person. There are two “Goodwill Superstores” in Anderson: the “new” one in the “acceptable” part of town; and the “old” one in the “shady” part of town. So shady, in fact, that I was told by first-person account, that under no circumstances should I visit the unsavory Goodwill unless I carried my “money” in either my “crotch” or “my bra.” True story. That being said, I choose the brand new Goodwill Superstore on the other side of town.
The store is big, beautiful and clean, in fact, it looks exactly like the store on the Goodwill commercial, complete with isles and isles of used clothing arranged (with care!) not only by size, but also by color! The resulting visual rainbow, combined with the super-bright fluorescent lights makes everything appear brand spankin’ new. It’s quite the illusion!
After my first “sweep” of Goodwill, I realized that there wasn’t a single item pet-related in the entire store. Unless you counted the rows and rows of pastel-colored sweatshirts with various cats, dogs, horses and other cartoon-y, sweetly demented looking animals embroidered on them, there wasn’t anything at all I could qualify as “pet supplies.” But, since my next stop (Belk, to buy a new bra) wouldn’t be open until 10 am, I decided to peruse the racks. After all, this was my first childless morning in over a month, and quite truthfully, I didn’t really know what to do with myself. The store was dead. The only other people were the sales clerk, two old ladies (who I decided were an 80 year old mom and her 60 year old daughter) and an older man, who was not with them. I listened as the younger old lady showed her mom some hunting-style pants she wanted. The mom thought they were “too big” but the daughter insisted that “she liked ‘em!” so into the cart they went. I even regarded them with a smile; their banter just went to show that once a mother and daughter, always a mother and daughter.
I walked aimlessly over to the “knick-knack” department, my inner monologue screaming at me to NOT purchase or bring home any useless junk. My Southern Living at Home addiction has made my house such that a single vase or trivet *may* cause my house to explode. Now, SLAH (as I like to refer to it) hardly qualifies as junk…but just the same, I really don’t need any more “stuff.” The older ladies lagged far behind me, so I could really take my time and look, without feeling like someone was breathing down my neck. And it was then, that I saw …
Just a few feet in front of me something caught my eye. It was two figurine-looking-things, and they appeared to be cats. Since everyone knows I can’t resist anything “cat” I (reluctantly disobeyed my inner voice telling me “NOOOOOOO!”) reached out and grabbed them. Once I had my hands on them, I realized that they were a sugar and creamer set, and they were in fact cats…standing erect…dressed in Victorian period clothing. The boy cat came apart at the waist, he was the sugar bowl. The girl cat was wearing a fancy bonnet which was open on top to pour cream. A pink bow on her bustle curved around to form a handle. They were so strange and tacky, but at the same time, seemed too nice to be in a place like Goodwill. One had a price of $0.75 and the other was $1.00. Even still, I put them back and continued to wander around. After my first, and what I thought would be my final loop around Goodwill, I impulsively decided to purchase the cat sugar and creamer. In the time it took to walk around, I had convinced my self that I love to collect things in pairs (I do have a small collection of sugars and creamers) and that they’d make a lovely (if not strange and tacky) addition.
When I returned to the knick-knacks, I inadvertently walked past the cats, at first, and found myself in the children’s toy area with the old ladies. So I retraced my steps, but they weren’t there. “Now, I KNOW they are here, I was just HOLDING them, just holding them as the little old ladies were…” and it hit me. “THOSE TWO LITTLE OLD BITCHES!” I hatefully thought! They saw ME looking at them (mistake #1), wondered what fascination they held, since they had obviously caught my “fake blonde, designer jeans, Tiffany necklace, Lulu Guinness purse” attention, and well, I obviously know style when I see it (hardy-har-har…), saw me put them back (mistake #2) and swooped in as soon as I was out of the area. Since I am an educated woman, I felt the need to test my hypothesis by spying (yes, spying) on their cart. Sure enough, down past the knick-knacks, in the children’s toy area, were the two old ladies…and sitting on top of a pile of books in the section of the cart a child can sit, were MY two cats. I was furious. Livid. At myself. How could I have let them go so easily? I had them in my hands, and lost them, just like that. And I couldn’t help but be both angry and envious of the two women, they saw my joy and fascination, and swooped in for the kill. Clever girls. I was so pissed, I actually considered the ramifications of just grabbing the sugar and creamer out of their cart. Could I get arrested? Would they keep a file-photo of my under the counter at Goodwill and refuse to serve me? After 1 second of obvious insanity, logic prevailed and the saying, “finders keepers, losers weepers” haunted me. I was a weeping loser, who CLEARLY needed to get out of the house more often and away from the kids.
I decided, in my moment of clarity, to tail the old bitties around the store. Why? I’m not really sure. I guess it was my disbelief that they actually picked up treasure, and hope that they would come to their own senses and realize that an 80 year old woman doesn’t really need kitty cat sugars and creamers. Oh damn, yes they do! They are the typical demographic for such items!!! What was I going to do? I’m sure that if I had been dressed to go running that day, the ladies would have thought I was fixin’ to rob them. Everywhere they went, I stayed a few feet behind. I mean, what if in their OWN moment of weakness, they decided to put MY items back? The hype of the situation was started to make my heart race, and I started to get “nervous sweat.” It was time for me to take a deep breath and realize that all of this nonsense was over something I didn’t even intend to buy in the first place. It wasn’t like I had “lost” something, because I never really had them. I needed to take another lap around Goodwill and take some deep breaths.
After chastising myself for this colossal waste of time, I decided to leave. With keys in hand, I headed for the door. And in order to get there, I had to pass the women as they checked out. I tried not to look, because I didn’t want to get upset (?!) all over again, but I had to, I had to look. And to my surprise, I didn’t see the cats anywhere! Had they already been rung up? It didn’t look like it, the semi-opaque Goodwill bag seemed too flat to contain breakables. A quick glace at the cart revealed nothing but books and that lame pair of hunting pants. I pivoted in place and headed to the knick-knacks. Had my hard work, determination and perseverance paid off? Did they have a change of heart? Did they see the crazy lady stalking them…knowing that I knew they had pecked off my treasures mere seconds after they left my hands and were afraid I would be waiting for them in the parking lot??? It didn’t matter, because the sugar and creamer were nowhere to be found.
The ladies checked out and left, and the older man checked out after them. I grabbed the clerk and asked, “Did those two old ladies buy anything with cats on them? Anything ceramic? Like a sugar and creamer!?”
“No, nope, just some books and clothes…”
“Then she must have hid them from me!” I exclaimed before I could stop myself, and thoughts of the “file-photo” banning me from Goodwill appeared in my thoughts again.
“What?”
“Oh, um, well, I was looking at these cats, and I put them back, and they came and snatched them, and I think, uh…”
No. It couldn’t be. I am never this lucky…In a bin next to the register holding handmade, crocheted, needle-pointed “stuff” for sale, were the sugar and creamer…ousted from the old lady’s cart at the eleventh hour. Had I not waited around and stalked like a damn crazy fool, I never would have seen them again.
I stopped talking and ran over the bin, grabbed the cats (one in each hand), raised them above my head like the Title Belt in a boxing bout, looked towards the sky and announced…
“VICTORIOUS!!!”
The Goodwill clerk seemed genuinely amused. And not like the confused, awkward amusement a “normal” person gets from watching someone who is clearly “not right,” but the actual joy of witnessing someone find a treasure at Goodwill. I paid cash for my treasures and smiled the biggest, most pleased smile. Although I was a bit embarrassed about my concern for my sugar and creamer, I was a) just happy to be happy b) glad that my biggest problem that day seemed to revolve around a $1.75 set of feline-inspired serving ware and c) that for once in a Blue Moon, something worked out for me. And hell, isn’t that what we ALL hope for each and every day?
The clerk wrapped my cats in newspaper and carefully placed them in a bag. We both agreed that they were even MORE of a treasure since they now have their own “story.” I went on to Belk, bought a bra and a dress (also treasures in their own right) and came home. When I got home, I noticed that their price tags had the date “1-2-08” on them. One the day of their purchase, they had only been at Goodwill 2 days. I washed my kitties, cleaned them up and set them out to dry. And for the rest of the day, I giggled as I passed by them in the kitchen.
All in all, it was a great lesson, both regarding thrift store shopping and for life, in general. I learned that when you go to Goodwill, you get a cart. Period. When you see something that you are even REMOTELY interested in, grab in and put it in your cart. Then wander around the store and think about it. Chances are it doesn’t cost much, and if you get home and you don’t want it, sell it on eBay. My Aunt bought an art print at a thrift store for $0.50 and sold it on eBay for $50.00. I also learned to hold on to what you have while you have it, because in an instant, by no fault of your own, it may be gone. And if you’re lucky enough to get it back, don’t ever let it go again! I learned to find the humor in the absurd situations in life (like harmlessly spying on two old ladies in Goodwill), and that sometimes problems that SEEM like problems at the time (like harmlessly stalking two old ladies at Goodwill) allow us to appreciate our many blessings, and to hope and pray we never know what REAL problems feel like. And every time I look at these two guys, I’ll be thankful for second chances.
I went into Goodwill looking for pet supplies. And I came out a changed person. There are two “Goodwill Superstores” in Anderson: the “new” one in the “acceptable” part of town; and the “old” one in the “shady” part of town. So shady, in fact, that I was told by first-person account, that under no circumstances should I visit the unsavory Goodwill unless I carried my “money” in either my “crotch” or “my bra.” True story. That being said, I choose the brand new Goodwill Superstore on the other side of town.
The store is big, beautiful and clean, in fact, it looks exactly like the store on the Goodwill commercial, complete with isles and isles of used clothing arranged (with care!) not only by size, but also by color! The resulting visual rainbow, combined with the super-bright fluorescent lights makes everything appear brand spankin’ new. It’s quite the illusion!
After my first “sweep” of Goodwill, I realized that there wasn’t a single item pet-related in the entire store. Unless you counted the rows and rows of pastel-colored sweatshirts with various cats, dogs, horses and other cartoon-y, sweetly demented looking animals embroidered on them, there wasn’t anything at all I could qualify as “pet supplies.” But, since my next stop (Belk, to buy a new bra) wouldn’t be open until 10 am, I decided to peruse the racks. After all, this was my first childless morning in over a month, and quite truthfully, I didn’t really know what to do with myself. The store was dead. The only other people were the sales clerk, two old ladies (who I decided were an 80 year old mom and her 60 year old daughter) and an older man, who was not with them. I listened as the younger old lady showed her mom some hunting-style pants she wanted. The mom thought they were “too big” but the daughter insisted that “she liked ‘em!” so into the cart they went. I even regarded them with a smile; their banter just went to show that once a mother and daughter, always a mother and daughter.
I walked aimlessly over to the “knick-knack” department, my inner monologue screaming at me to NOT purchase or bring home any useless junk. My Southern Living at Home addiction has made my house such that a single vase or trivet *may* cause my house to explode. Now, SLAH (as I like to refer to it) hardly qualifies as junk…but just the same, I really don’t need any more “stuff.” The older ladies lagged far behind me, so I could really take my time and look, without feeling like someone was breathing down my neck. And it was then, that I saw …
Just a few feet in front of me something caught my eye. It was two figurine-looking-things, and they appeared to be cats. Since everyone knows I can’t resist anything “cat” I (reluctantly disobeyed my inner voice telling me “NOOOOOOO!”) reached out and grabbed them. Once I had my hands on them, I realized that they were a sugar and creamer set, and they were in fact cats…standing erect…dressed in Victorian period clothing. The boy cat came apart at the waist, he was the sugar bowl. The girl cat was wearing a fancy bonnet which was open on top to pour cream. A pink bow on her bustle curved around to form a handle. They were so strange and tacky, but at the same time, seemed too nice to be in a place like Goodwill. One had a price of $0.75 and the other was $1.00. Even still, I put them back and continued to wander around. After my first, and what I thought would be my final loop around Goodwill, I impulsively decided to purchase the cat sugar and creamer. In the time it took to walk around, I had convinced my self that I love to collect things in pairs (I do have a small collection of sugars and creamers) and that they’d make a lovely (if not strange and tacky) addition.
When I returned to the knick-knacks, I inadvertently walked past the cats, at first, and found myself in the children’s toy area with the old ladies. So I retraced my steps, but they weren’t there. “Now, I KNOW they are here, I was just HOLDING them, just holding them as the little old ladies were…” and it hit me. “THOSE TWO LITTLE OLD BITCHES!” I hatefully thought! They saw ME looking at them (mistake #1), wondered what fascination they held, since they had obviously caught my “fake blonde, designer jeans, Tiffany necklace, Lulu Guinness purse” attention, and well, I obviously know style when I see it (hardy-har-har…), saw me put them back (mistake #2) and swooped in as soon as I was out of the area. Since I am an educated woman, I felt the need to test my hypothesis by spying (yes, spying) on their cart. Sure enough, down past the knick-knacks, in the children’s toy area, were the two old ladies…and sitting on top of a pile of books in the section of the cart a child can sit, were MY two cats. I was furious. Livid. At myself. How could I have let them go so easily? I had them in my hands, and lost them, just like that. And I couldn’t help but be both angry and envious of the two women, they saw my joy and fascination, and swooped in for the kill. Clever girls. I was so pissed, I actually considered the ramifications of just grabbing the sugar and creamer out of their cart. Could I get arrested? Would they keep a file-photo of my under the counter at Goodwill and refuse to serve me? After 1 second of obvious insanity, logic prevailed and the saying, “finders keepers, losers weepers” haunted me. I was a weeping loser, who CLEARLY needed to get out of the house more often and away from the kids.
I decided, in my moment of clarity, to tail the old bitties around the store. Why? I’m not really sure. I guess it was my disbelief that they actually picked up treasure, and hope that they would come to their own senses and realize that an 80 year old woman doesn’t really need kitty cat sugars and creamers. Oh damn, yes they do! They are the typical demographic for such items!!! What was I going to do? I’m sure that if I had been dressed to go running that day, the ladies would have thought I was fixin’ to rob them. Everywhere they went, I stayed a few feet behind. I mean, what if in their OWN moment of weakness, they decided to put MY items back? The hype of the situation was started to make my heart race, and I started to get “nervous sweat.” It was time for me to take a deep breath and realize that all of this nonsense was over something I didn’t even intend to buy in the first place. It wasn’t like I had “lost” something, because I never really had them. I needed to take another lap around Goodwill and take some deep breaths.
After chastising myself for this colossal waste of time, I decided to leave. With keys in hand, I headed for the door. And in order to get there, I had to pass the women as they checked out. I tried not to look, because I didn’t want to get upset (?!) all over again, but I had to, I had to look. And to my surprise, I didn’t see the cats anywhere! Had they already been rung up? It didn’t look like it, the semi-opaque Goodwill bag seemed too flat to contain breakables. A quick glace at the cart revealed nothing but books and that lame pair of hunting pants. I pivoted in place and headed to the knick-knacks. Had my hard work, determination and perseverance paid off? Did they have a change of heart? Did they see the crazy lady stalking them…knowing that I knew they had pecked off my treasures mere seconds after they left my hands and were afraid I would be waiting for them in the parking lot??? It didn’t matter, because the sugar and creamer were nowhere to be found.
The ladies checked out and left, and the older man checked out after them. I grabbed the clerk and asked, “Did those two old ladies buy anything with cats on them? Anything ceramic? Like a sugar and creamer!?”
“No, nope, just some books and clothes…”
“Then she must have hid them from me!” I exclaimed before I could stop myself, and thoughts of the “file-photo” banning me from Goodwill appeared in my thoughts again.
“What?”
“Oh, um, well, I was looking at these cats, and I put them back, and they came and snatched them, and I think, uh…”
No. It couldn’t be. I am never this lucky…In a bin next to the register holding handmade, crocheted, needle-pointed “stuff” for sale, were the sugar and creamer…ousted from the old lady’s cart at the eleventh hour. Had I not waited around and stalked like a damn crazy fool, I never would have seen them again.
I stopped talking and ran over the bin, grabbed the cats (one in each hand), raised them above my head like the Title Belt in a boxing bout, looked towards the sky and announced…
“VICTORIOUS!!!”
The Goodwill clerk seemed genuinely amused. And not like the confused, awkward amusement a “normal” person gets from watching someone who is clearly “not right,” but the actual joy of witnessing someone find a treasure at Goodwill. I paid cash for my treasures and smiled the biggest, most pleased smile. Although I was a bit embarrassed about my concern for my sugar and creamer, I was a) just happy to be happy b) glad that my biggest problem that day seemed to revolve around a $1.75 set of feline-inspired serving ware and c) that for once in a Blue Moon, something worked out for me. And hell, isn’t that what we ALL hope for each and every day?
The clerk wrapped my cats in newspaper and carefully placed them in a bag. We both agreed that they were even MORE of a treasure since they now have their own “story.” I went on to Belk, bought a bra and a dress (also treasures in their own right) and came home. When I got home, I noticed that their price tags had the date “1-2-08” on them. One the day of their purchase, they had only been at Goodwill 2 days. I washed my kitties, cleaned them up and set them out to dry. And for the rest of the day, I giggled as I passed by them in the kitchen.
All in all, it was a great lesson, both regarding thrift store shopping and for life, in general. I learned that when you go to Goodwill, you get a cart. Period. When you see something that you are even REMOTELY interested in, grab in and put it in your cart. Then wander around the store and think about it. Chances are it doesn’t cost much, and if you get home and you don’t want it, sell it on eBay. My Aunt bought an art print at a thrift store for $0.50 and sold it on eBay for $50.00. I also learned to hold on to what you have while you have it, because in an instant, by no fault of your own, it may be gone. And if you’re lucky enough to get it back, don’t ever let it go again! I learned to find the humor in the absurd situations in life (like harmlessly spying on two old ladies in Goodwill), and that sometimes problems that SEEM like problems at the time (like harmlessly stalking two old ladies at Goodwill) allow us to appreciate our many blessings, and to hope and pray we never know what REAL problems feel like. And every time I look at these two guys, I’ll be thankful for second chances.
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